Are you enjoying the freedom and independence that comes with finding your special someone? You know what you want so now it’s up to you to find it. It’s great being in control but have you started to feel the pressures of finding your soul mate?
I read an interesting snippet about Love Marriage by Pushpendra Rana that proposed women who are trying to find a love marriage may be more affected to conform to conventional male ideas about beauty than those interested in a more traditional arrange marriage.
This got me thinking about the types of pressures women face when finding their own partner so I decided to poll the women that use Desi Spark to find a love marriage to find out what pressures they feel. Here are the top 3 pressures:
From every Bollywood & Hollywood romantic movie ending happily ever after to all the women’s magazines describing the perfect wedding. The Media constantly puts pressure on women by reminding them that they are not married.
- “What about you?”
They only mean well but women hear the same question over and over again when a friend, parent or aunty hears about someone getting married that isn’t them.
- Cultural Clock
The clock keeps ticking on the unwritten rule that affects most Indian women around the world. If a women passes 30 and is not married she becomes less desirable.
What are your thoughts? Tell us in the comments.
A great quote that sums up love marriages in India perfectly. It comes from Chetan Bhagat’s book “2 States” that was published back in 2009. The book is loosely based on Chetan’s life and follows Krish and Ananya on their journey from being in love to having a love marriage.
Love marriages around the world are simple:
Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy.
They get married.
In India, there are a few more steps:
Boy loves Girl. Girl loves Boy.
Girl’s family has to love boy. Boy’s family has to love girl.
Girl’s Family has to love Boy’s Family. Boy’s family has to love girl’s family.
Girl and Boy still love each other. They get married.
What do you think about the quote? Tell us in the comments…
It can be lonely. You might feel desperate. It can be embarrassing. These are just a few of the feelings you might experience as you try to find that special someone to spend the rest of your life with. Above all, it can be frustrating! No matter how you meet your potential matrimonial partner you still need to make sure they, and their family, have the same morals and values as you and your family. This is not an easy feat. Things like caste, creed, language, religion all play into your decision.
Desi Spark was created to help enable all Indians to find their matrimonial partner, but it’s more than that, which I'll come to later.
I recently read a blog post by someone that goes by Nyx who has lost faith in the institution of marriage. Here’s a snippet of her great blog post that you can read here.
I wish India was the sort of place where you can just walk into a bar and strike up a nice conversation with a nice guy…But it isn’t. Even admitting that you would like to have a boyfriend to your friends is considered ‘desperate’…There aren’t enough opportunities for people to mingle and socialise and find somebody compatible.
Come to think of it, I don’t have much faith in the institution of marriage itself anymore, but I seriously think that the concept of arranged marriage (if marriage HAS to exist) should be done away with, because it reinforces religious, caste, class and regional barriers in our country with a vengeance. I propose we add a new Fundamental Right to our Constitution – the right to live your own life.
It’s unfortunate that Nyx feels that the power to find her own life partner has been taken out of her control. This was one of the fundamental reasons behind creating Desi Spark. Desi Spark is 100% free because it breeds independence – it gives you the control.
Yes, Desi Spark is an Indian matrimonial site – but in the end it’s a tool. A tool that you can wield whichever way you want, and a tool that has no barriers to entry. In Nyx’s hands it has the power to help her find her perfect match. In her parents’ hands it could be used to filter down potential matrimonial partners.
In the end, there is no wrong way to you use it, only your way – the right way.